Chronic Pelvic Pain in Perimenopause: How I Learned to Listen to My Body's Whispers
I thought menopause would be more... obvious somehow. Like there'd be a clear before and after. But that's not how it happened for me at all. Instead, it crept into my life slowly, weaving itself through everything I thought I knew about my body.
As I moved into perimenopause, my body started throwing me curveballs I never saw coming. Chronic pelvic pain appeared out of nowhere, IBS symptoms began wreaking havoc with my digestion, my bladder became unpredictable, and I started getting these intense lower back seizures that would stop me in my tracks. It felt like my body was introducing me to a whole new version of myself - one I didn't recognize at all. Some days I felt like I was living in someone else's skin.
Those Magical (But Fleeting) Moments
Here's what surprised me: even in the thick of all this chaos, I'd have these moments where everything just... settled. Maybe it was after a gentle yoga class, or when I'd catch myself taking a really deep breath without thinking about it. For just a few minutes, my body would feel less like a battlefield and more like home.
At first, I thought these were just random lucky breaks. But looking back, I realise my body was trying to tell me something important: "Hey, this actually helps. Pay attention."
The Science Behind the Struggle
When I was going through this, there wasn't nearly as much information about perimenopause as there is today. I felt like I was stumbling around in the dark, trying to piece together what was happening to my body.
Once I started digging deeper, everything began to make more sense. Those dropping estrogen and progesterone levels weren't just messing with my periods – they were throwing my entire stress system out of whack. My gut health, my pain levels, my sleep – everything was connected in ways I'd never understood.
I found this fascinating study from Seattle that tracked women through perimenopause and found that our cortisol levels (hello, stress hormone!) actually spike during this transition. Even when life looks calm on the outside, our bodies are working overtime internally. No wonder I was lying awake at 3 AM with my mind racing and my stomach in knots.
Finally, I had an explanation for why everything felt so intense. It wasn't just hormones – it was my whole system trying to find a new normal.
Learning to Work With (Not Against) My Body
The thing is, perimenopause didn't wait for a convenient time in my life. It showed up right in the middle of everything else I was dealing with. But those little moments of relief I mentioned? They became my guideposts.
I stopped trying to fight my way through and started paying attention to what actually helped. Not the quick fixes or the "should dos," but the small, gentle practices that made my body whisper "yes" instead of "no."
Yoga classes became less about getting stronger and more about finding space in my body. Breathing exercises weren't just trendy wellness advice – they were actual tools that helped calm my nervous system.
What I Wish Someone Had Told Me
Midlife isn't about losing who you were – it's about discovering who you're becoming. And sometimes that person is softer, more intuitive, and way more in tune with what she actually needs.
The path through perimenopause and menopause isn't linear. Some days you'll feel like you're making progress, and others you'll feel like you're back at square one. That's not failure – that's just how healing works.
Your experience might be messy and complicated and not fit neatly into anyone else's story. That's okay. Actually, it's more than okay – it's real, and it's valid, and it's yours.
Those small moments of calm and clarity? They're not accidents. They're your body's way of showing you the way forward. Trust them, follow them, and be patient with yourself as you navigate this wild, transformative time.
Because here's what I've learned: strength doesn't always look like pushing through. Sometimes it looks like listening, adjusting, and honoring exactly where you are right now.
References
1. Cortisol levels during the menopausal transition and early postmenopause — Menopause, 2009
